Preparing the Way

Yeah... I have lotsa time. ;) Yesterday, I spent a considerable amount of it talking to Uncle Ban in church where he shared with me the “Family Of Origin” model which was quite enlightening and liberating… hahaha… after he did the session with me, I realized that there are still lotsa things God needs to iron out in my life.. yes. And I’m glad it’s all coming out… and now what do I do with all this knowledge??

Do I go around moaning about them, feeling all so guilty concerning how imperfect my life is? Do I weep about, sulking and wallowing in depression cos there are so many issues in my life that need fixing?? By all means no! that would get me nowhere... cos that’s just merely perpetuating that perfectionist attitude that comes from worldly thinking and is of the devil… How do I know this? Cos I did it before… for many years… and guess wad- it got me nowhere... in fact, all that guilt in itself proved to be an obstacle in my spiritual walk… There were times where I used to scrutinize myself everyday wanting to come clean before God… and in doing so, it left me further away from Him! …left me with no joy, with no vision, with no awareness of who He is- just of who I am and all the nasty things associated with it…

Knowing what was wrong in my life brought legalism… it brought guilt… it comes from the tree of knowledge of good and evil… cos in knowing what was wrong, it brought about the kind of mentality saying “I’m not good enuf”… and these things lead to death… remember how Judas hanged himself? He hanged himself over remorse for having betrayed an innocent man… and he didn’t enter into the knowledge of the grace of God. Guilt is not repentance.

The reason why I’m saying all of this is cos some of us are prone to condemn ourselves for what we’ve done and all those nasty things in our lives… but the Bible says that there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus… Yes, there may be some things in our lives that need to change (and perhaps many more that we're not even aware of)... Yes, we shouldn’t take sin lightly… cos sin is a serious thing u noe… but to the point that it causes us to focus on ourselves and not on Him?? That defeats the purpose of repentance.. Cos cleansing is a work of the Holy Spirt... it's not something we achieve.. it's something He does in our lives... I love preaching against guilt cos I have a personal score to settle, having been captive by it for a long time… and I write all these so that we may know how to handle that awareness of sin in our lives…

So where do I go from here? What do I do with knowing that my life isn’t as sorted out as I thought it was? Do I ignore it and just move on as if nothing has happened? Of course not... but instead of wallowing in guilt or self-condemnation, I choose to surrender them to God, believing sincerely in my heart that those ways are wrong and deciding that I should choose God’s way over mine instead.. I will surrender and commit these areas to Him knowing that His ability to transform me is far greater than sin’s ability to consume me… and I will live life His way… by His power, by His ability and by His grace…

You see, the focus is not on ourselves… it’s on Him… cos life is all about Him… You know what… if u struggle with these issues, ring me up, write me a mail or something... cos I know how it feels… I have a tendency to be a perfectionist, a control freak… and that made the guilt over all those imperfections all the more stronger… But surrendering is the key yeah… I’m not gonna let these things rob me of my joy! I know my rights in the Kingdom! And I’m not afraid to use them… ;)

Today went to church and did more CC stuff, tasted Uncle Peter's homemade apple crumble and went for prayer meeting in the evening...

This morning before i got out of bed, the Lord was just showing me how i have to decrease and Jesus has to increase.. It's what John the Baptist said when more people started flocking to Jesus and less to him... and that's what the ministry of preparation is all about, even in preparing the way for revival.. it's pointing people to their God and calling for a restoration of relationship with Him... we're living in exciting times yeah! :)

How BIG is your Jesus? :)

Adios!